An open letter to Milk, Milk based-products.

Dear Milk(s) and onward,
Open letters are often written out of concern and so on. This letter is written out of love; It is also written out of fear. Fear that all my friends will one day get sick of my jokes. See this makes sense if you know that most of my jokes, secrets, lies are all just different fart shared in a variety of ways. Milk is to blame. Milk; be not ashamed. Why a lactose sensitivity? I'm a sensitive guy.